


Five Times Hawkeye and Charles Don’t Tell Each Other What They Think And One Time They Do

by Summertime_Poet



Series: MASH ficlets [4]
Category: MASH (TV)
Genre: :D, Angst, Fluff, M/M, Prompted Writing, and charles exasperated but full of fond feelings, hawkeye is kinda dramatic at times, i'm new to this ship but pls everyone join in it's a good one, starts out with a bit of angst and then moves toward the fluff department, they both don't always say what they think but it's okay, they get each other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-12
Updated: 2019-03-12
Packaged: 2019-11-16 07:04:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,490
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18089681
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Summertime_Poet/pseuds/Summertime_Poet
Summary: But it is not time for that kind of talk yet.Right now, it is 3am in Tokyo, and Hawkeye Pierce is busy reaching for his bathrobe, ready to wrap it around himself and his rumpled pajamas. With the added weight off his chest, Charles sits up as fast as he can. He reaches out for Hawkeye’s hand, catching three fingers only at first but holding onto them as if he were holding his entire hand. Startled by the shift of the bed and the sudden touch, Hawkeye freezes and carefully turns around. His other hand is still holding onto his bathrobe, as if his mind is made up, but the gaze Charles now is at the receiving end of is full of fear, past hurt and an odd amount of hope.





	Five Times Hawkeye and Charles Don’t Tell Each Other What They Think And One Time They Do

**Author's Note:**

  * For [onekisstotakewithme](https://archiveofourown.org/users/onekisstotakewithme/gifts).



> Five times Charles and Hawkeye don’t say what they’re thinking and one time they do- six scenes ranging from angst but developing toward fluff starting shortly after Charles’s arrival at the camp and ending several years post-canon.
> 
> Prompted fic for the awesome [onekisstotakewithme](https://archiveofourown.org/users/onekisstotakewithme/pseuds/onekisstotakewithme)! Thank you so, so much for this prompt (and getting me into this nice ship <3), I had lots of fun writing this! ♥ 
> 
> Enjoy! <3

1) _Pierce, I am scared._

They are already gathered inside of Colonel Potter’s office and Hawkeye just suggested drawing matchsticks, while the colonel himself is standing outside at the radio station, still trying to argue for only one of them having to go help out at Battalion Aid. In the end it’s no good though: The other camps either already sent surgeons themselves or can’t afford to send one of their staff either, and Hawkeye is very well aware BJ and the colonel were the ones who went to the front the last times. Charles has been stationed at their camp for a while already but hadn’t been to the front so far, so the honor will fall to the two of them.

Hawkeye takes a steadying breath when he climbs into the truck and he can see Charles trying not to let on the worry he feels. Hawkeye almost says something then but finds he can’t lie about it not being so bad. It’s always bad, just like this entire war.

It doesn’t take long once they have arrived for another attack to hit the area immediately before the bustling medical camp. They continue tending to the patients that have it worst, keeping the dust off them as best as they can. Charles looks like he is ready to pass out for the first two or three hours.

They get a short break when a surgeon from another camp arrives and takes over and move to an adjacent room where they won’t be in anyone’s way. Hawkeye lets himself slide down the wall tiredly, every bone in his body aching and the smell of blood still in his nose making it impossible to enjoy a breath of fresh air.

“Pierce, this is-“ Charles doesn’t get the chance to say _Hell_ , because that very instant, a mortar shell goes off almost immediately behind the wall they’re both resting against.

Hawkeye ducks and doesn’t remember reaching out as he waits for the life to be drained from him, and neither does Charles, but they both do. The next seconds are filled with the sound of debris raining to the ground and people screaming outside, and against all odds, their wall is still standing, they are still alive.

Charles moves in Hawkeye’s arms. Under normal circumstances he would never have-

But this isn’t normal. And he’s never been this scared for his life before. Charles’s eyes are screaming in panic when he opens them and Hawkeye does the same, meeting his gaze from mere inches away.

Charles doesn’t need to say it, even if he could, if he weren’t trembling in their tight embrace. Hawkeye’s been here before. And he knows how the panic, the fear for one’s life, never gets less no matter how often you’ve come here before.

_Pierce, I am scared._

 

2) _You’re a good brother, Charles. And a better person than you want to let on._

Hawkeye must have found out somehow. Charles doesn’t know how, and for some reason it seems like he hasn’t even told Hunnicutt yet, no comment coming from the other man over the course of the following week, but when the other surgeon enters the swamp and heads straight for the distiller, Charles can see a faint smile playing around the corner of his lips. He finished recording his reply to Honoria a good minute before Pierce entered the tent, so surly he can’t have heard-

Did he wait outside for Charles to finish his recording? It doesn’t seem much like the man that is his constantly loud, annoying bunkmate, but maybe... Just maybe Hawkeye Pierce has some sense of consideration and decency after all.

When Hawkeye sits down on his cot with a tired groan, a martini in his hand, Charles looks up to meet his eye for a short instance. What he sees confuses him deeply. Pierce is wearing a visible smile on his lips now as he toasts to Charles. It almost looks like he means to say something to him, only to think better of it and keep quiet, drinking his martini in silence, his gaze now fixed on BJ’s empty cot.

He had seen Charles’s copy of Moby Dick on to the young private’s bed last month, had heard about how said private had been bullied at first and had put one and one together. He had also accidentally walked in on Charles recording replies to his sister two times already, stopping in his tracks today when he heard Charles speaking softly inside the swamp. This time he waited for him to finish recording his letter before going inside. He doesn’t know much about Honoria Winchester, but Charles seems to care deeply about her.

He takes another sip of his martini as he glances at the man on the cot opposite of his out of the corner of his eye.

_You’re a good brother, Charles. And a better person than you want to let on._

 

3) _I won’t tell a soul._

He doesn’t mean to walk in on Pierce and the unfamiliar corporal who are kissing each other frantically in the supply shed. He should have waited outside and knocked, long ago having learned the rule of the sock on the door handle. And still, he can’t help but keep staring for the split second it takes until Hawkeye finds his gaze and there’s panic in his eyes, then anger, then panic again and then a mix of both. Hawkeye is stammering and the corporal is winding out of his arms, ducking behind the high supply shelves and out of Charles’s field of view.

“You- Charles, _please_.” Hawkeye is struggling to get words – any, really – past his lips and Charles _understands_ , understands _so well_ , but he can’t do much more but give Hawkeye a court nod and a calm “I am not one to start gossip and I certainly shall not start with stories of your romances either, Pierce.” Then he turns and leaves the room, leaving a gaping Hawkeye and the nameless corporal behind.

He walks straight out of the front door, the supply check he’d been meant to do forgotten about. As he leans against the sidewalls of the building, half hidden by the shade, he lets the breath he’d been holding out. His hands and the clipboard he is holding are shaking, and he’s both embarrassed at what happened, for the most part, really, but also just the tiniest bit... delighted? Not at having caught Pierce and the corporal kissing quite intimately, but very much at the fact that he thinks... he understands him a bit better now. Charles doesn’t intend to give him any reason to be able to say the same, but... the thought that someone in the camp would be able understand his position is comforting nevertheless.

His thoughts travel back to the supply shed and Hawkeye’s fearful gaze. He clenches the nails of one hand into his palm as he considers what he truly had wanted to tell the other man that moment. How much he really meant it, wouldn’t tell anyone nor otherwise get him in trouble for it.

_I won’t tell a soul._

 

4) _Stay. Please._

Hawkeye is running his fingers in little circles over Charles’s chest, his head resting heavy against the very same. Every breath he takes is a bit of a challenge with the added weight half on top of him. He huffs, and the air he exhales makes the top of Hawkeye’s shock of black hair move slightly.

“Do you always do this when you’re nervous, Pierce?”

Hawkeye lets out a stifled laugh that vibrates right against Charles’s chest. “Who are you to speak? Mister ‘I call the guy I just kissed senselessly by his last name’?”

“Pierce, look-“ Charles lets out a groan that sends Hawkeye into a genuine fit of laughter. “Hawkeye! ... Hawk. Will you please look at me?” He places a hand under Hawkeye’s chin, gently directing the other man to look at him again. He has been avoiding meeting Charles’s eyes for the past five minutes now and, to be quite frank, it is making Charles antsy.

The view he receives takes his breath away for a moment. Hawkeye is still laughing when their gazes meet, his eyes sparkling mirthfully while also expressing an overwhelming fondness. Charles has to fight the urge to lean in and kiss him again.

Just a second later, however, the expression on Hawkeye’s face changes as a thought seems to pass through his mind. The one that had originally driven him from Charles’s reach, his face thereafter hidden in Charles’s chest.

Hawkeye turns his head away and Charles swears he understands what he mumbles next clearly. “I will only be the ruin of you.”

They haven’t talked about this yet. How they each feel about this... arrangement of theirs. What is going to happen when the war finally ends.

Charles has... an odd feeling deep down in his chest that tells him he already knows. Knows what he hopes for. Possibly understands that Hawkeye might just agree with his sentiments. But it is not time for that kind of talk yet.

Right now, it is 3am in Tokyo, and Hawkeye Pierce is busy reaching for his bathrobe, ready to wrap it around himself and his rumpled pajamas. With the added weight off his chest, Charles sits up as fast as he can. He reaches out for Hawkeye’s hand, catching three fingers only at first but holding onto them as if he were holding his entire hand. Startled by the shift of the bed and the sudden touch, Hawkeye freezes and carefully turns around. His other hand is still holding onto his bathrobe, as if his mind is made up, but the gaze Charles now is at the receiving end of is full of fear, past hurt and an odd amount of hope.

Charles’s voice carries the lightest tremble when he speaks up into the silence between them. “Don’t go yet.”

_Stay. Please._

 

5) _I won’t give up on you, no matter what happens._

The door lock breaks open a second after they had frantically closed the visible portions of their buttons again.

“Finally,” Hawkeye rasps out, then blames the scratchiness of his voice on the heat in the supply shed they allegedly have been stuck in for almost an hour now. He doesn’t even make a remark about the annoyance of being stuck with Charles of all people anymore. They’re long past that and Hawkeye doesn’t want to feign, doesn’t want to throw verbal stabs Charles’s way even when they both know they’re only lies.

They still don’t talk about it, but it’s there. They only changed their view on each other drastically half a year ago, but it’s enough to make their relationship something they won’t forget – don’t want to forget – for a lifetime. Something so strong that it almost makes them forget about the danger of a blue discharge at times.

Later, much later that day, Charles passes by Hawkeye as he enters Post-OP for his shift. Their hands brush for the briefest moment and Hawkeye takes hold of Charles’s hand as he passes him, squeezing it ever so shortly. He doesn’t stop for a short conversation, a talk that could only cover work-related issues or private ones that were of less importance than what had happened earlier, had been happening for a while now, but that’s alright.

Charles watches Hawkeye walk briskly toward the swamp before turning and going inside to look after their patients. His hand is still tingling from Hawkeye’s brief touch.

_I won’t give up on you, no matter what happens._

 

\+ 1) “Till later at the hospital. I love you, Charles.”

Hawkeye is practically draped over his shoulder and whining from the back of his throat. Charles doesn’t know if he should roll his eyes in annoyance or give in and laugh.

“Don’t go.” It’s mumbled into his shoulder and it sounds grumpy as only Hawk manages to be on occasion, said occasion being when he wakes up earlier than he has to and Charles is leaving for work already. Lord have mercy, Charles can even feel him pout through his suit jacket.

Two gangly arms wrap around him and for a moment, Charles is mentally back in Korea and they’re sitting in a jeep, Hawkeyes arms and a blanket wrapped around him comfortingly, with only the stars above them as witnesses. Then he turned around and raises an eyebrow at the man he came to love so many years ago, earlier than he’d allowed himself to admit it.

“Unlike _you_ , I have work in the morning already, Hawkeye. Besides, I can’t afford to be late to my lecture. While my students are quite the eager sort when it comes to learning, they sadly appear to be just as curious about my private life at times. Especially when I’m late for class.” Charles pauses for emphasis, noting the grin that was slowly spreading on Hawkeye’s face. He finds himself returning the grin as he gently lifts Hawkeye’s hands off his shoulders. Hawkeye is quick to replace his hold on Charles, though, his arms now wrapped loosely around Charles’s middle. “Speaking of which, I shouldn’t have brought you for that guest lecture last semester. They keep asking about you all the time!”

“How bad can it be?” Hawkeye asks, seriously, before deciding that it’s time to say goodbye to Charles’s neck, peppering kisses all over his skin. Charles shudders under Hawkeye’s ministrations but makes sure to elaborate nevertheless.

“Well, while the occasional question about whether you will be looking for an apprentice in two years’ time seems quite genuine, I also received a few more personal inquiries the week after you held that lecture. All of them were concerned with the status of your... availability.”

Hawkeye merely hums as he keeps pressing kisses up Charles’s throat. When he reaches his chin, he pulls away. “Well, tell them I’m taken. Smitten. Utterly and foolishly in love for the rest of my life.” He puts his hands over his heart dramatically before pressing a kiss to Charles’s lips, lingering a moment longer than he knows Charles is bound to tolerate when under beginning time pressure.

“How about dinner at that new Italian place down the street this evening?”

Charles tsks. “Again? We only went there the other day. And the day before that.” “Can’t help it, they really know how to make a good pizza.” Hawkeye is grinning at him. “So- is it set?” Charles rolls his eyes at him fondly, but nods. “It is.”

“Now- go look dashing and go dazzle your students with your brilliance,” Hawkeye teases and, with a sweet final kiss, steps back so that Charles can finally leave.

“Till later at the hospital. I love you, Charles.”

Charles makes sure to meet his gaze before placing his hand over his heart.

“I love you, too- utterly and foolishly.”

**Author's Note:**

> As always, you can also find this fic on my [fanfic blog](www.patsdrabbles.tumblr.com). ^_^ ❤
> 
> Feedback is, no matter how short, super appreciated and bound to make my entire week! <333


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